Maxine's Living Will...

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

______ Glass of wine;
______ Margarita;
______ Martini;
______ Cold Beer;
______ Chicken fried steak and cream gravy;
______ Mexican food;
______ French fries;
______ Pizza;
______ Bowl of ice cream;
______ a cup of tea;
______ Chocolate;
______ Sex;

It should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

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This came to me via Amy. Thanks, Ames.