Glue...It's Not Just For Sniffin' Anymore

There are so many things wrong with this story...

1. The man went to his ex-girlfriend's house.

2. He fell asleep at his ex-girlfriend's house.

3. She super glued his genitals to his abdomen.

4. She super glued his butt cheeks together.

5. She wrote a profanity on his back in nail polish.

And my favorite...

6. Her attorney claims that it was a consensual act.

I don't know about you, but back in my younger days, I couldn't wait for Friday and Saturday night. So, I could run out, get my drink on, and pick me up a honey to glue my stuff all together and shut.

I've got one word for this...

Shit.

UPDATE: Okay, the judge ruled. In the criminal case, she had to spend six months...probation for misdemeanor assault. Jeez, that's all. If the man had glued a woman's boobs down and glued her...stuff shut, I bet he'd have gotten a year or more in jail, no probation.

Then, in the civil case...are you ready for this. The poor bastard's genitals were glued to his abdomen and his butt cheeks were glued together and then...then, he had to walk a mile or so to call for help. How much? What's the dollar figure?

$46,000.00.

[blank stare]

This reeks of gender specific legalisms to me. I guarantee if it had been a man doing this to a woman, he'd have done more time and had to pay more money on the civil side.

Jeez.