The Smoking Lamp -- JLU-2001's Batman: For You

Smoking Lamp #45
++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is lit...
++++++++++++++++++

Imprint: JLU-2001
Series: Batman: For You #2
Author: Bertram Gibbs
Title: "Two"

The Penguin's death scene is good and creepy.

The bird seed love note gave me that hair standing up on the back of my neck reaction.

The vulture torture is a great grisly scene. Loved it.

I like Batman's focus being so intense that he doesn't hear Gordon come in.

I want to know who is behind it all. But I don't want to read it too fast. Its great the way that you have the reader feeling Batman's emotions as his foes, his villains, are revealed in an odd way to be people he cared about.

I like the Catwoman portrayal here, almost playing the role of den mother to Batman's rogues.

And as for the cliffhanger, I just have one thing to say...OH SHIT!

Good stuff. Loved the story.

I give it 10 out of 10 cigars.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is extinguished...Steady as she goes.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

puff

Useless Trivia - Question 6 - Answer 5

And again Brother Steve puts in a request for boobs and butts. Sorry folks, one track mind. Okay to be fair, two tracks...baseball.

True or False
(Worth Four Points)

One of the following recent news stories is fake. Which one is it?

1. Breastfeeding Mom Ticketed for Exposing Herself in Denver
2. Quilters Raise $25,000 for Breast Cancer Study
3. Winner of Annual Microsoft Bad Writing Contest-1st Place Compares Fixing Carburetors to Fondling a Woman's Breasts
4. International Genetics Council Survey Reveals that Breast Sizes Are
Increasing by Generation

Answer 5

In what movie did Keanu Reeves portray an undercover law enforcement officer posing as a surfer? [Worth 1 point]

a. Point Break

Correct Answers:

Steve (5)
Craig (3)
Cadi (1)

Send your answers to me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

SL-GH-GH-GH-M-TF

Great Movie Lines #1

From Troy (2004).
Spoken by Brad Pitt's Achilles as he sits near a fire on the coast near Troy after having taken the Priestess of Apollo prisoner and deciding that he is going to keep her for himself.

I want what all men want. I just want more.

Yes, gentlemen...watch the movie and the second Brad Pitt utters the line, turn to your wife, girlfriend, or significant other and say, "I do too."

I got pushed out of bed. Maybe you'll have better luck.

That is greatness.

I just want more.

HA!

It is a good movie. Well worth watching. I stayed awake way too late on a night when I had to get up way too early the next morning...but it was worth it.

Speaking in a language that the terrorists understand...

I'm calling for a Crusade against terrorism.

Screw fatwas and jihads.

Crusade Against Terror.

Join C.A.T. today.

Say hi to our mascot!

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 20

Week 20 Race Results - Pocono International Speedway
Pennsylvania 500

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. -(Your name here)

2 -- Rusty Wallace/2 -(Nancy)
3 -- Mark Martin/6 -(Jerry)
4 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
6 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
11 -- Jamie McMurray/42 -(Cadi)
13 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)
15 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
17 -- Greg Biffle/16 -(Jerry)
26 -- Michael Waltrip/15 -(Cadi)
27 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)
31 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
32 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 -(Stephanie)


Points after Week 20…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

3 - Greg Biffle/16 - 2712 --(Jerry)
4 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 2617 --(Nancy)
7 - Mark Martin/6 - 2490 --(Jerry)
10 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 2372 --(Darla)***
11 - Jamie McMurray/42 - 2363 --(Cadi)
12 - Carl Edwards/99 - 2360 --(Mark)
13 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 2299 --(John)
14 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 2262 --(Stephanie)
15 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 2258 --(Craig)
19 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 2122 --(Cadi)
22 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 2037 --(Cadi)
29 - Ken Schrader/49 - 1799 --(Mark)

***10th place is the line for the Chase for the Championship.

When NASCAR begins the Chase for the Championship, we'll start keeping score just based on those of us involved in the Just Us Cup. Our points system will be based on the driver's finishes in direct relation to one another instead of how they finish verses the rest of the field.

Self meet the Real World...

Haven't we all felt this way every now and again?

Christmas in July!

Behold brothers in dorkdom. It is the lyrics to the Heat Miser song from "The Year Without a Santa Claus."

I'm Mister Green Christmas
I'm Mister Sun
I'm Mister Heat Blister
I'm Mister Hundred and One
They call me Heat Miser,
What ever I touch
Starts to melt in my clutch
I'm too much!

He's Mister Green Christmas
He's Mister Sun
He's Mister Heat Blister
He's Mister Hundred and One

They call me Heat Miser,
What ever I touch
Starts to melt in my clutch

He's too much!

Thank you!
I never want to see a day
That's under sixty degrees
I'd rather have it eighty,
Ninety, one hundred degrees!
(spoken)
Oh, some like it hot, but I like it
REALLY hot! Hee hee!

He's Mister Green Christmas
He's Mister Sun

Sing it!

He's Mister Heat Blister
He's Mister Hundred and One

They call me Heat Miser,
What ever I touch
Starts to melt in my clutch
I'm too much!

Too Much!

Now then...if you are of a certain age and you remember this little claymation show that used to show every Christmas, chances are you have this song playing in your head right now.

You should be happy that I couldn't find an MP3 of the song or it'd be playing through your speakers right now. EDIT: HA! I found it...as you can no doubt tell by now.
Enjoy the ear worm. I did when it showed up in my email.

Now let's see...what was I doing?

Oh yeah.

I'm Mr. Green Christmas
I'm Mr. Sun

SCHMACK! Face plant.

USA diver Chelsea Davis hit her head during the World Swimming Championships in Montreal.

Bloodied, she was rushed to a nearby hospital after being pulled from the pool by German diving coach Lutz Buschkow.

She was conscious and sitting up before being taken to the hospital for stitches.

That looks like it has got to hurt.

Useless Trivia - Question #5, Answer #4

Movies

In what movie did Keanu Reeves portray an undercover law enforcement officer posing as a surfer? [Worth 1 point]

a. Point Break
b. Matrix
c. Speed
d. A Walk in the Clouds

Question #4 Answer

Match the state capitol to the state?

a. Montgomery - 3. Alabama
b. Carson City - 1. Nevada
c. Frankfort - 4. Kentucky
d. Olympia - 2. Washington

Correct Answers:

Steve (4)
Craig (2)
Cadi (1)

And Steve nails the four-point question to take the lead.

Send your answers to me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

SL-GH-GH-GH-M

Godspeed!

The Smoking Lamp - Av2k's Solo: On the Run #3

Smoking Lamp #44
++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is lit...
++++++++++++++++++

Imprint: Avengers 2000
Series: Solo: On the Run #3
Author: Des Davies
Title: "Best Laid Plans"

I love that scene in the kitchen with Janine chewing Solo out. The context might be different but a lot of men have sat in that chair.

Dark happenings in a ghost town. Cool stuff!

"While I live, Terror dies!"

I want to see more of Solo. He's the best.

I give it 7.5 out of 10 cigars.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is extinguished...Steady as she goes.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

puff

Things I Thought I Would Never Say #6

It was a Sunday afternoon.

I was laying on the couch watching a NASCAR race. My guys were losing. Carl Edwards was running 24th and Schrader was in the garage after having got caught up in someone else's wreck. I was half paying attention.

The kids were picking up their stuff out of the living room. This seems almost to be a constant process. Their stuff seems to migrate endlessly to the living room from their bedrooms and the garage.

I am laying there and I see these shorts on the floor. I reach over and pick them up. They seem inordinately small. The whole fabric is about the size of my hand.

"Whose are these?" I ask incredulously. I'm thinking that who ever claims them, they aren't ever wearing them again if I have anything to say about it.

"They belong to the teddy bear, Mark," Emily answers in that "almost a teenager" sarcasm-laced voice that I've become accustomed to lately. She gestures at a small gray bear laying nearby on the living room floor as she picks up another bundle of stuff and carries it back to their room.

I pick up the bear and slip the shorts on it.

"Ah," I think relieved that the shorts are the bear's and not something that one of the girls are wearing out into the world.

Then, I notice that the bear's shorts have an open fly...a gaping open fly. And I'm thinking, "Why in the world does this thing need an open fly like that?"

And of course, being a man, I check to make sure he isn't anatomically correct.

Nope, nothing there.

Hmmm...so I asked, "What's the hole in this teddy bear's shorts for?"

And darling, growing up way too fast, Emily responded, "His tail. Duh, Mark. You put them on him backwards."

She snatched her bear from me and took him back to her bedroom.

"Oh," I said and laid back down to watch the race in the slightly embarrassed silence that follows.

puff

Park Like An Idiot and Get Stuck...

I Park Like An Idiot

They have affordable packs of bumper stickers so you can stick it to those bastards who take up two or more spaces or the ones who are half in the street when they parallelogram parked instead of parallel parking and left their asses hanging out in the street.

Just struck me as funny.

puff

Useless Trivia - Question #4 - Answer #3

Geography and History
Match the state capitol to the state?

a. Montgomery
b. Carson City
c. Frankfort
d. Olympia

1. Nevada
2. Washington
3. Alabama
4. Kentucky

Question #3 Answer

Ajax, Agamemnon, and Achiles all died in which Greek War?

d. Trojan

Correct Answers:
Craig (2)
Cadi (1)

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

SL-GH-GH-GH

The Smoking Lamp #43 - Av2k's Captain America #26

Smoking Lamp #43
++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is lit...
++++++++++++++++++

Imprint: Avengers 2000
Series: Captain America #26
Author: Michael Franzoni
Title: "Proteges: A New Road Forward, Part Two"

Cool to see Cap and Prentis begin to work together, even if it is just Prentis covering for Cap as he makes his getaway from Sharon Carter. Shame that "working together" means Prentis getting reamed by Agent 13.

The piece of fabric is an intriguing plot device. I am curious about whether it is legit or not.

With the way the attacker moved, I suspected that he was Batroc the Leaper, but it appears that I am mistaken.

A man with no tongue. When he started drooling, I thought cyanide capsule.

Good cliffhanger. Looking forward to more.

I give it 8.5 out of 10 cigars.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is extinguished...Steady as she goes.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

puff

Cow-mentary

DEMOCRATIC
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbara Streisand sings for you.

REPUBLICANISM
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?

SOCIALIST
You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST
You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk
the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are
surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the
analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow
and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give
excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION
You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private
parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find
alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.

IRAQI CORPORATION
You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.

BELGIAN CORPORATION
You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy.

FLORIDA CORPORATION
You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally
vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you
think is the best-looking cow.

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION
You have millions of cows.
They make real California cheese.
Only five speak English.
Most are illegals.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.

Sent to me by Friend Jeff.

R.I.P. Scotty

Actor James Doohan passed away earlier today.

The engines can take it, Scotty. Go on home.

America's Third World Navy

The Coast Guard's ships and aircraft are aging quickly toward obsolescence. The age of the majority of their cutters run between 37 and 50 years old. The Algerian and Pakistani Navy are more modern than our Coast Guard.

Unscheduled maintenance has grown in the service by a factor of three since 1999.

Maybe instead of selling the Navy's decommisioned ships to foreign powers we should refurbish more of those boats and put them into Coast Guard service.

Would they be brand new? No. Would it be cheaper than buying new? Yes. Would it give us a short term solution pending the slow modernization of the Guard? Yes.

Isn't the Coast Guard's job too important in a post-911 world to allow it to fall into disrepair?

C'mon, you know the answer to that one.

The government is working on a deepwater replacement force, but what about the rest of the fleet. Its going to take 25 years, but they are working on it.

In 2004, the Coast Guard helicopter fleet experienced a failure/unanticipated maintenance record in the 330 issues per every 100,000 flying hours. There were 23 hull breeches requiring dry dock repair. All 12 of the Guard's big Pacific Ocean cruisers suffered engine trouble while on patrol.

My source for this data was an excellent article from USA Today.

The Coast Guard's area of responsibility includes patrolling the 361 ports and 95,000 miles of coastline that make up our great country. They are tasked with boarding and inspecting many thousands of cargo and recreational vessels every year as well as having a hand in security at all American commercial ports.

Doesn't it seem like everything in our power should be done to make sure that these guys have the tools they need to do a good job?

Read this for a look at life aboard one of the aging Coast Guard vessels.

Useless Trivia - Question 3 and Answer 2

Geography and History
Ajax, Agamemnon, and Achilles died in what Greek war?

a. First Peloponesian War
b. Carthaginian-Athenian War
c. The Persian Invasion
d. The Trojan War

Geography and History

France has cities and regions in it that read like a wine list. Which of the following does not belong?

d. Riesling

Correct Answers:
Craig (2)

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

SL-GH-GH

Disturbing Art Featuring Celebrities

Disturbing!

Great commentary.

Highly recommended.

The Donald Trump Constipation fake ad was the best.

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 18

Week 18 Race Results - /Chicagoland Speedway
Chicagoland 400

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. -(Your name here)


1 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 -(Stephanie)
10 -- Mark Martin/6 -(Jerry)
11 -- Greg Biffle/16 -(Jerry)
12 -- Rusty Wallace/2 -(Nancy)
18 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
19 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
22 -- Jamie McMurray/42 -(Cadi)
26 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
33 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)
36 -- Michael Waltrip/15 -(Cadi)
39 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
41 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)

Points after Week 18…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

2 - Greg Biffle/16 - 2440 --(Jerry)
4 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 2300 --(Nancy)
6 - Mark Martin/6 - 2202 --(Jerry)
8 - Jamie McMurray/42 - 2190 --(Cadi)***
11 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 2139 --(Darla)
12 - Carl Edwards/99 - 2073 --(Mark)
13 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 2057 --(Stephanie)
14 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 2052 --(John)
15 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 2046 --(Craig)
19 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 1925 --(Cadi)
21 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 1800 --(Cadi)
28 - Ken Schrader/49 - 1644 --(Mark)

***10th place is the line for the Chase for the Championship.

The gap has widened to the point where only the Top Ten would be in the Chase if it started today.

Chicago was the worst showing by our focused drivers since the start of the season. Fewer of our guys were in the Top Ten this week than any other race all season.

When NASCAR begins the Chase for the Championship, we'll start keeping score just based on those of us involved in the Just Us Cup. Our points system will be based on the driver's finishes in direct relation to one another instead of how they finish verses the rest of the field.

Useless Trivia - Question 2 and Answer 1

Geography and History

France has cities and regions in it that read like a wine list. Which of the following does not belong?

a. Champagne
b. Cognac
c. Bordeaux
d. Riesling

Science and Language

The American Cancer Society recommends a breast self-examination be done...

a. once a month

Correct Answers:
Craig (1)

Yes, I'm keeping score anyway...so I lied, shoot me. Its not like this is a journalism site, its editorialism and fun stuff.

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

SL-GH

Ken Schrader interview

In the State Journal Register of Springfield, Illinois

He's just a good guy.

No Baseball. No Softball. No Shit!

The International Olympic Committee announced last week that it was dropping baseball and softball from the Olympics in 2012.

This blows me away. And pisses me off.

Read Fay Vincent's comments here from the New York Times.

Softball seems to have gotten swept along because of MLB's lax anti-doping policies. Boo!

I wonder if this is just an example of the world giving America the finger as Fay suggests.

So baseball and softball were passed over in favor of rifle shooting, archery, sculling, and Greco-Roman wrestling.

On top of that, none of the five sports vying to replace baseball and/or softball received enough votes to become an Olympic sport. Squash, rugby, golf, karate and roller sports were up for the open spots.

So they have eliminated two of the twenty-eight Olympic sports. Two that received viewership here in the U.S.

I. O. C. President Jacques Rogge pushed to eliminate the two sports. Dr. Jacques Rogge is from Belgium. This move was so anti-American that I expected to discover he was French.

The American teams have dominated in baseball and softball. This is on a par with the Soviets winning the 1972 Gold Medal in Basketball when they didn't deserve it.

BAH!

Bastards!

National Sex Offender Database

Why the hell not?

I don't get why setting this thing up is so hard.

It should have multiple pictures of each subject. It should have a DNA profile of each subject. It should have current address information and anyone of these bastards who slips off the map, address-wise, needs to be hunted down by the FBI.

Their failure to maintain their address information with the appropriate agency should be an instant violation of life-long parole and they should get to spend a year in jail thinking about how easy it would have been to have updated their information.

Our children are too precious to risk.

Find your Senator's email here. Send it now. Tell them you support a National Sex Offender Database.

Find your Representative's email here. If your zip code is split between more than one Representative, you will need your full 9 digit zip code to find their email.

Do it today. Its too important not to.

The Hottest Places on the Face of the Earth

Before you complain about the summertime heat, think of this...

The hottest natural Earth-bound recorded temperature was noted in El Azizia, Libya with 136 degrees Fahrenheit.

Second place goes to Death Valley, California with 134 degrees.

But neither one of these places has the highest average temperature. That honor belongs to Dakol, Ethiopia where the average temperature is 94 degrees Fahrenheit.

All of these places share a few geographic anomalies. They are all on the edges of deserts. They are in mid to low latitudes and get far more direct sun than other areas. They are also in geographic low spots in relation to sea level.

So yeah, Texas is hot and Arizona is hot. And a muggy Summer's day in New York is hot, but you could be in the Mojave or on the edge of the Sahara.

Yes, I'll have a Strawberry Daiquiri, a Pina Colada and two Crown and Cokes to go...

A gas powered daiquiri blender?!?!?!?

You can buy one at Uncrate.com for $260.

C'mon...that's cheap for being able to mix a pina colada on the beach without lugging a blender and a generator around...isn't it?

Handlebar grip speed control, a Zip-start 25cc motor from Homelite and an unbreakable jar...uh huh, the Titanic was unsinkable too.

I bet someone tailgating at the upcoming NASCAR race at Texas Motor Speedway has one. This thing has tailgating written all over it.

HA! And if you look here, they are selling replacement or extra unbreakable jars. HA!

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 17

Week 17 Race Results - Daytona Intntl Speedway
Pepsi 400

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. -(Your name here)

2 -- Jamie McMurray/42 -(Cadi)
3 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 -(Stephanie)
4 -- Rusty Wallace/2 -(Nancy)
5 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
7 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)
10 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
16 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)
24 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
33 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
36 -- Greg Biffle/16 -(Jerry)
39 -- Mark Martin/6 -(Jerry)
40 -- Michael Waltrip/15 -(Cadi)

Points after Week 17…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

2 - Greg Biffle/16 - 2305 --(Jerry)
5 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 2173 --(Nancy)
7 - Jamie McMurray/42 - 2093 --(Cadi)
8 - Mark Martin/6 - 2068 --(Jerry)
10 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 2030 --(Darla)
12 - Carl Edwards/99 - 2027 --(Mark)
13 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 1982 --(Craig)***
14 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 1946 --(John)
16 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 1872 --(Stephanie)
17 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 1870 --(Cadi)
21 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 1760 --(Cadi)
26 - Ken Schrader/49 - 1554 --(Mark)

***13th place is the line for the Chase for the Championship.

When NASCAR begins the Chase for the Championship, we'll start keeping score just based on those of us involved in the Just Us Cup. Our points system will be based on the driver's finishes in direct relation to one another instead of how they finish verses the rest of the field.

God bless...

God bless America!
God save the Queen and the peoples of the United Kingdom!

Fuck al-Quaeda!

'nuff said.

puff

Useless Trivia - Question One

I'm changing the format again in the interest of making it easier on me. I'll just be dropping one question at a time. And since Brother Steve did request more tits and ass...

Science and Language

The American Cancer Society recommends a breast self-examination be done...

a. once a month
b. twice a month
c. three times a year
d. when they feel tender

We are dropping the contest since there is a general lack of interest in competing. I will be dropping a new question every two or three days.

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

puff

I'm back...

I had a great vacation on the beach. Very much sand, sun, beer and family fun was had by all. Swimming, fishing off the pier, the best shrimp I've ever eaten in my life.

I could run away to Port Aransas and live out the balance of my days a happy man...if I could figure out a way to make a living wage down there that didn't involve me having to be sea sick five days a week.

puff