Vacation

Through the Cigar Smoke is on vacation from today until after July 8th.

Gone on vacation.

Much beach.

Much beer.

Much good times.

Peace.

Happy Fourth of July!

puff

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 16

This was an ugly week. Just look at the finishes. Rusty Wallace and Dale Jarrett are the only ones who pulled Top 10's this week.

Week 16 Race Results - Infineon Speedway
Dodge/Save Mart 350

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. -(Your name here)

4 -- Rusty Wallace/2 -(Nancy)
5 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
13 -- Jamie McMurray/42 -(Cadi)
14 -- Greg Biffle/16 -(Jerry)
15 -- Mark Martin/6 -(Jerry)
22 -- Michael Waltrip/15 -(Cadi)
33 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)
35 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
37 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
38 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
41 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)
42 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 -(Stephanie)

Points after Week 15…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

1 - Greg Biffle/16 - 2250 --(Jerry)
5 - Mark Martin/6 - 2022 --(Jerry)
6 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 2013 --(Nancy)
9 - Carl Edwards/99 - 1963 --(Mark)
10 - Jamie McMurray/42 - 1923 --(Cadi)
12 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 1870 --(Darla)
13 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 1855 --(John)***
14 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 1836 --(Craig)
15 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 1827 --(Cadi)
18 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 1707 --(Stephanie)
21 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 1640 --(Cadi)
28 - Ken Schrader/49 - 1420 --(Mark)

***13th place is the line for the Chase for the Championship. A lot of bad finishes on the road course at Sonoma has scrambled the points again.

When NASCAR begins the Chase for the Championship, we'll start keeping score just based on those of us involved in the Just Us Cup. Our points system will be based on the driver's finishes in direct relation to one another instead of how they finish verses the rest of the field.

A Bad Hair Fourth of July...

And we are graced today with the presence of truly bad, bad, bad hair.

Three NASCAR guys and a former giant of the recording industry turned murderer.

We at Through the Cigar Smoke want to thank Rusty Wallace, Roy Tyner, Darrell Waltrip and Phil Spector for their phenomenally bad hair choices back in the day.

The NASCAR guys pics are all from the 70's. Recent photos suggest that they have grown out of their bad hair phase.

Spector's pic is from the courtroom less than a year ago. Somebody needs to get him a big boy haircut. I bet that one is real, real popular in prison. His cellmate probably likes rubbing his hands through it while they are spooning.

Is that disturbing enough?

Happy Fourth of July!

puff

UTC-Test Round 2

1. People and News

Hawaiian Pets Gain Right of Inheritance. How many of the United States have
legal trust laws set aside for the support of surviving pets?

a. 5
b. 20
c. 8
d. 17

2. Science and Language


Comet Temple I is in NASA's targets this week. they are attempting to:

a. destroy the comet
b. alter the comet's course
c. blow a hole in the
comet's interior to allow study

3. Food and Drink

Burger King opened their first franchise in this country on Monday.

a. Egypt
b. Saudi Arabia
c. China
d. Russia

4. Geography and History

Walvis Bay is a seaport on the edge of a desert in what country?

a. South Africa
b. Namibia
c. Australia
d. Sri Lanka

5. Sports and Art

Former NHL franchise, the Hartford Whalers were moved to a different city and their name was changed. They are now known as:

a. Tampa Bay Lightning
b. San Jose Sharks
c. Columbus Blue Jackets
d. Carolina Hurricanes

The winner of Test Round 2 is...Steve Cline with 2 points.

So we got four responders for Test Round 1. We got one for Test Round 2.

Is there any interest in going on with this? Or should I just put up an occasional trivia question and go with that instead of a contest.

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com.

puff

Stuff written by me...

The ongoing adventures of premiere Canadian super team continue at Avengers 2000...

Alpha Flight #22

By Mark "Puff" Anderson

"The Battle of Alpha Island; The Rise of the Wicker Man, Conclusion"

Frost limed Wildchild’s face. Icicles grew from his hair and his nose in rapid succession. Black Ice was freezing him from the inside out.

Wildchild’s teeth were clenched to keep from chattering. He tore at Black Ice. In response, more and more of those thin gray fissures appeared on Ice’s surface.

“Oh God,” Wildchild thought, “he seems to get colder every time one of those things open.

Find Back Issues Here

*******

JLU-2001 presents the King of the Seven Seas:

Aquaman #10

By Mark "Puff" Anderson

"Revenge Served Hot"

Aquaman faced Black Manta across the littered wreckage of the torpedoed sled.

“Where is my son?” Aquaman asked.

The gray, slick-skinned humanoid manta smiled. “Soon enough,” he said and clicked a switch on the control panel before him. A net shot from the front of his sled. The metal mesh wrapped around Orin. Manta hit a second switch on the panel.

T-ZAK! A million volts of power fed through the net. Gritting his teeth, Arthur groaned as his muscles spasmed in response to the energy coursing through him.

Find Back Issues Here

A quiet little news story involving RADIATION IN THE MAIL

In the Dallas Morning News's adjunct "easy reader" newspaper, Quick, about a month ago, a story appeared.

Origins of Radiation Package a Mystery

Dallas FBI agents were trying to determine yesterday who mailed an envelope emitting an unusually high level of radiation to a U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services building on Stemmons Freeway. The envelope was postmarked from Turkey, but had an Arizona return mailing address. No one was hurt.

Okay...that's the complete story as it appeared in the newspaper. I never saw anything about it on the news...even locally.

Doesn't that seem like it should have been a bigger story?

I'm guessing that it really wasn't a very big deal since Dallas is still here.

But wouldn't there be an increased cancer risk for the postal employees who handled the letter in question.

Shouldn't there have at least been a mention of something like this on the national news? It amazes me that local news is so much "human interest" that they can't afford to report on real news even when it happens in our own backyard.

It just blows my damned mind.

puff

Useless Trivia Challenge - Test Round 2

1. People and News

Hawaiian Pets Gain Right of Inheritance. How many of the United States have
legal trust laws set aside for the support of surviving pets?

a. 5
b. 20
c. 8
d. 17

2. Science and Language

Comet Temple I is in NASA's targets this week. they are attempting to:

a. destroy the comet
b. alter the comet's course
c. blow a hole in the
comet's interior to allow study

3. Food and Drink

Burger King opened their first franchise in this country on Monday.

a. Egypt
b. Saudi Arabia
c. China
d. Russia

4. Geography and History

Walvis Bay is a seaport on the edge of a desert in what country?

a. South Africa
b. Namibia
c. Australia
d. Sri Lanka

5. Sports and Art

Former NHL franchise, the Hartford Whalers were moved to a different city and their name was changed. They are now known as:

a. Tampa Bay Lightning
b. San Jose Sharks
c. Columbus Blue Jackets
d. Carolina Hurricanes

Respond to: puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com

The UTC - Test Round 1 answers...

The Useless Trivia Challenge - Test Round 1

The questions are:

1. People and News

Name the Scientologist?

a. Kirstie Alley

b. Jim Belushi

c. Leonardo di Caprio

d. Jay Leno

2. Science and Language

What does the word apropos mean?

a. relevant

b. reticient

c. recipient

d. real

3. Food and Drink

The 1st canned beer, "Krueger Cream Ale", was sold by the Krueger Brewing
Company in:

a. 1879

b. 1840

c. 1952

d. 1935

4. Geography and History

Turkey, Lebanon, Iraq and Iran, all shared a common national identity prior to
World War I. What was this nation called?

The Ottoman Empire

5. Sports and Arts

Whose nickname was Satchmo?

a. Satchel Paige

b. Louis Armstrong

c. Honus Wagner

d. Jimmie Satchinski

Both were referred to as Satchmo at during their careers. Either was acceptable.

The winner of Test Round 1 was Steve Cline with 21 points.

Test Round 2 posts Monday with answers coming on Thursday.

1000

Through The Cigar Smoke broke 1,000 viewings today.

Thanks for stopping by,
puff

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 15

Week 15 Race Results - Michigan International Speedway
Batman Begins 400

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. -(Your name here)

1 -- Greg Biffle/16 -(Jerry)
3 -- Mark Martin/6 -(Jerry
5 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
7 -- Michael Waltrip/15 -(Cadi)
10 -- Rusty Wallace/2 -(Nancy)
13 -- Jamie McMurray/42 -(Cadi)
18 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)
17 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 -(Stephanie)
24 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
25 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
28 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
32 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)


Points after Week 15…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

2 - Greg Biffle/16 - 2124 --(Jerry)
4 - Carl Edwards/99 - 1923 --(Mark)
5 - Mark Martin/6 - 1904 --(Jerry)
8 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 1848 --(Nancy)
10 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 1803 --(John)
11 - Jamie McMurray/42 - 1799 --(Cadi)
12 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 1767 --(Craig)
14 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 1730 --(Cadi)***
15 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 1715 --(Darla)
17 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 1670 --(Stephanie)
20 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 1600 --(Cadi)
27 - Ken Schrader/49 - 1362 --(Mark)

***11th place is within 374 of 1st. As of today, everyone from Jamie McMurray forward would make the Chase for the Cup, which would leave out Jeff Gordon, Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Kasey Kahne. One of the race announcers joked that he wouldn't be surprised if NASCAR didn't put in a fan vote to make sure that Earnhardt got into the Chase.

Batman Begins

I like the new Batman movie.

I'm glad that they chose to use the Scarecrow and Ra's al Ghul as the bad guys this time around. I do wish they had forgone foreshadowing the Joker. I would have preferred it if we hadn't seen the Joker until later in this cycle of movies. C'mon, who is going to stand up to Nicholson's performance. That was greatness. Jack was the only one who could pick up the gauntlet of Cesar Romero, the best Bat Villain from the 60's TV series...hands down.

I would also prefer that the filmmakers in the new cycle of stories stay away from the Schumacher overly cartoonish elements that drug the franchise into the crapper the first time around. It wasn't Clooney's fault and it wasn't Kilmer's fault...it was Schumacher trying to make a live action cartoon instead of making a movie with a touch of realism that could communicate with a wider audience. Instead of a live action cartoon, I'd rather see a movie length cartoon in the vein of the animated movie, Batman: Mask of the Phantasm, which was pretty dang good. I've got to find it on DVD someday soon. But if you are going to make a movie, then make a movie, no cartoons with real people for something like Batman.

The first hour of the movie was slow...very slow. The last hour made up for it.

The horror movie elements where the story was being shown from the criminal's point of view were pretty good. And I like the way that they set up pretext of why Batman has so many nut job villains...thanks Scarecrow, thanks Ra's.

All in all, it was a movie worth watching and worth going to see again.

puff

Wow...I wonder how much money they spent on this?

Yawning Report

I am so comforted that scientists have time to focus on why yawning is contagious. Lord knows in a world where things like cancer, SIDS, AIDS, stroke, and heart attack are extant, I'm worried about why yawns are contagious.

Jeez!

puff

Giant Popsicle Attacks New York

Figures...its Snapple!

Publicity stunt gone awry.

They were trying to market their new line of frozen Snapple popsicles when New York got a burst of first day of summer-type weather.

A whole NYC park flooded with strawberry-kiwi...ICK!

puff

The Useless Trivia Challenge - Test Round 1

The questions are:

1. People and News

Name the Scientologist?

a. Kirstie Alley

b. Jim Belushi

c. Leonardo di Caprio

d. Jay Leno

2. Science and Language

What does the word apropos mean?

a. relevant

b. reticient

c. recipient

d. real

3. Food and Drink

The 1st canned beer, "Krueger Cream Ale", was sold by the Krueger Brewing
Company in:

a. 1879

b. 1840

c. 1952

d. 1935

4. Geography and History

Turkey, Lebanon, Iraq and Iran, all shared a common national identity prior to
World War I. What was this nation called?

5. Sports and Arts

Whose nickname was Satchmo?

a. Satchel Paige

b. Louis Armstrong

c. Honus Wagner

d. Jimmie Satchinski

All 5 questions will come out on the first day. The round stays open until the Friday after posting. Sometimes the questions will be posted on Monday, sometimes on Tuesdays, this will depend on my schedule and commitments. So some rounds will last 3 days and some will last 4.
1 point for each correct answer, with an additional point for each day before deadline day. So if you answer on Friday and get one answer wrong, you only get 4 points. If you answer on Thursday and get one answer wrong, you get 5 points, 4 for your answers and 1 for a day bonus. If you answer on Tuesday and get one answer wrong, you get 7 points, 4 for your answers and 3 for a day bonus.

Answers to be sent to puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com with the subject line Useless Trivia Challenge.

Is that clear as mud?

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com with questions.

Bah on PBS...sorry that is Boohbahs on PBS

Whoever is in charge over at PBS needs their heads examined.

This Boohbah crap is just that crap. I've woken up in the morning three or four times now to this programming on the local PBS station here in Dallas. Its disturbing. These things look like animated clitorises that have grown legs and started walking around.

Aren't programs that appear on have educational value?

Now on the associated website they claim that the Boohbah's have said value. I disagree. Its not like its Sesame Street or the Electric Company.

I woke up one morning to Mr. Man, Ms. Lady, and Little Dog Fido chasing 3 beards...yes beards up and down a beach. The beards jumped on their faces and, then, would jump off and float around before coming to rest on another face...and then the characters would laugh. Then, the Boohbahs, all, dance.

BLANK STARE! BLANK STARE! BLANK STARE!

Educational value, my ass.

The description on their site is as follows:

Boohbah is different from most educational TV. It is intended to foster a style of active viewing in which the things that children learn from viewing are not determined primarily by the content of the program, but rather by the ways that young viewers (and the grown-ups who care about them) engage with the program.

Uh huh.

I'll give them that it is different...very, very different.

Whoever approved this did too much LSD prior to the design phase.

Boohbah's approach to mathematics is largely kinesthetic. That means that Boohbah can help children experience math concepts through movement and music rather than through the more common cognitive skills like recognizing numeric symbols or memorizing multiplication tables. So you won't see numbers flying across the screen or characters pointing out that three plus two equals five.

So...they dance and its supposed to teach the children math...but there are no numbers.

BLANK STARE! BLANK STARE! BLANK STARE!

That's three(3) blank stares, by the way.

There are very few words in Boohbah. So how can it help your child develop language skills? With your participation.

Help children expand their vocabulary by helping them name the things they see. For example you can describe the way the Boohbahs move: Look at them twist to the left or I wonder if you could jump on your right foot like that? You can also help your child learn new words by introducing synonyms to the words he already knows. So, for example, if he already knows the word middle, introduce the word center.

So...they claim to teach language by you talking to your child.

What the hell do I need this freakin' show for then?

And if you need a bunch of giant rainbow colored clitorises to dance around on the television screen for your child to learn how to use your imagination, I would suggest a therapist. You can either take the kid now, or later when they begin to wonder why they were watching clitorises dance as children.

They are very careful on their website to not show a picture of the clitorises, otherwise, I would have included one here.

These things are disturbing.

The Useless Trivia Challenge Lives!

A few years ago, I ran an email trivia game for a group of friends.

I am going to start posting it again here on Through The Cigar Smoke. Those of you who played before, the rules have changed.

There are 5 categories:

1. People
2. Science and Language
3. Food and Drink
4. Geography and History
5. Sports and Arts

All 5 questions will come out on the first day. The round stays open until the Friday after posting. Sometimes the questions will be posted on Monday, sometimes on Tuesdays, this will depend on my schedule and commitments. So some rounds will last 3 days and some will last 4.

1 point for each correct answer, with an additional point for each day before deadline day. So if you answer on Friday and get one answer wrong, you only get 4 points. If you answer on Thursday and get one answer wrong, you get 5 points, 4 for your answers and 1 for a day bonus. If you answer on Tuesday and get one answer wrong, you get 7 points, 4 for your answers and 3 for a day bonus.

Answers to be sent to puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com with the subject line Useless Trivia Challenge.

Is that clear as mud?

Contact me at puffdoggydaddy@yahoo.com with questions.

We will play a test round next week 6-20-2005 and depending on how that goes possibly another test round the week after. I am on vacation the week after that and, then, we can start in earnest the week of 7-11-2005.

puff

Things I Thought I Would Never Say #5

There we were...Saturday morning, a beautiful day. The sun was shining. It was a little warm, but if warm is going to make you not enjoy the day then you are going to spend your summer time life indoors in Texas.

Anyway, there we were. Cadi, the girls, and me waiting on a park bench in front of the zoo for my mother to show up with my sister and my niece for my niece's birthday.

We wait.

And we wait.


And we wait.

Finally, here they come walking through the parking lot. Woo hoo! Let's go see the monkeys.

Suddenly, Abby is crying and crying hard.

Cadi beats me to her...as she always does. And she should, she's her Momma.

When Abby tried to stand up from the park bench she drove a fair-sized splinter under her fingernail. You can see it sticking all the way through under the nail to the back of her nail. The thing looks huge.

We try to pull it out..., but we can't get a hold on it. It is totally under her nail. We don't have any tweezers and I'm not sure we could have gotten a hold on the thing even then, like I said it was totally under her nail.

So there we are. The edge of the splinter is under the edge of her nail...just right under the edge.

So I said...


"Hold on baby, I'm going to bite your fingernail down so your Mom can get the splinter."

And I did.

I never in my life, ever, considered the possibility of biting another human being's fingernail.

Maybe this should have been titled "Things I Thought I Would Never Do."

Until next time,
puff

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 14

Week 14 Race Results - Dover International Speedway
MBNA RacePoints 400

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. -(Your name here)

1 -- Greg Biffle/16 -(Jerry)
3 -- Mark Martin/6 -(Jerry
5 -- Rusty Wallace/2 -(Nancy)
13 -- Michael Waltrip/15 -(Cadi)
16 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
22 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 -(Stephanie)
23 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
25 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
26 -- Jaimie McMurray/42 -(Cadi)
35 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)
37 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
39 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)


Points after Week 13…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - Laps Led - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

2 - Greg Biffle/16 - 890 - 1866 --(Jerry)
6 - Mark Martin/6 - 10 - 1588 --(Jerry)
7 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 219 - 1584 --(Nancy)
9 - Carl Edwards/99 - 56 - 1574 --(Mark)
10 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 146 - 1573 --(John)
11 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 306 - 1562 --(Craig)
13 - Jaimie McMurray/42 - 0 - 1536 --(Cadi)*
14 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 1 - 1500 --(Darla)
15 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 5 - 1494 --(Stephanie)
17 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 94 - 1419 --(Cadi)
18 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 314 - 1409 --(Cadi)
30 - Ken Schrader/49 - 14 - 1175 --(Mark)

* The field is beginning to stretch out some. If the Chase for the Cup started today, Jaimie McMurray would be the last qualifier. This would put 13 cars within 400 points of first and in the Chase for the Championship. The others would just have to be content with running for that first spot outside the chase which pays a $1,000,000.00 bonus plus incentives from the sponsors.

The Firm

Didn't we all know this already?

Click the link. Go read the article while its still up. Heh!

The Firm Factor

Important information for men.

A university study has determined that its healthy to have sex and orgasms three times a week. Its good for a man's mind and his heart.

Quick run tell your wives...its for your health, HA!

And if you've gone floppy...GO SEE YOUR DOCTOR. It may be a sign of something even more serious.

puff

The Smoking Lamp #42 - Av2K's Iron Man #33

Smoking Lamp #42
++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is lit...
++++++++++++++++++

Imprint: Avengers 2000
Series: Iron Man #33
Author: Thomas Deja
Title: "Hail to the New Flesh, Part Two;
The Greatest Trick of the Devil"

Doom having, HAVING, to address the UN to seek aid must about be
driving him nuts. That's a lot of pride to swallow.

A Dr. Doom with no time for games? Has to be something of a first
considering that his entire relationship with the Fantastic Four has
been one long, very deadly game of one-ups-manship. If its true. If he
can be trusted...oh c'mon, its Dr. Doom, fer Gawd's sake. Of course, he
can't be trusted.

I'm hoping that the strength of Happy's convictions keeps him where
he's at. Could give him more of a Father/Confessor role to play off of
Tony with.

I like the Iron Man thwarts kidnapper scene. There's not enough hero
vs. "real" crime in comics anymore. Good stuff.

I suspect that Tony putting the armor back on may be a long, long time
coming...and I'm good with that.

So the Avatars are back, but do they work for the Mandarin? Hmmm.

I give it 9.0 out of 10 cigars.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The lamp is extinguished...Steady as she goes.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

puff

Bachelor Food: Chicken & Cornbread Stuffing Casserole

4 to 6 boneless chicken breasts
1 box Stovetop-style Cornbread Dressing
1 10 oz package of frozen broccoli
2 cans of Cream of Broccoli with Cheese soup
1 can of Chicken Broth

Lightly butter or spray slow cooker. Place chicken breasts in bottom. Mix other ingredients and place on top of chicken. Cover and cook on high for 6 to 7 hours.

Around the 4 1/2 to 5 hour mark, may have to stir it if dressing sublimates up to the top and begins to dry out. Just stir it back in.

Served with cheesy corn.

Enjoy

Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith

At the end of Attack of the Clones, I felt that there was still too much story to tell to put us in the position where you could just say, "time passes until the beginning of Episode 4."

I'll admit that Lucas dotted all of his t's and crossed all of his i's...yes I meant to write that just like that.

Sith was rushed. There was a lot of great story there that was crammed in. Looking back now, the Phantom Menace didn't tell enough of the story. Maybe the second movie should have been done vignette-style with one taking place in the shadows of the rise of the Phantom Menace, the discovery of the Clones on Genosis taking place 5 or 10 years later, and then, jumping forward another 5 years for the final vignette featuring the Jedi alongside the clones attacking Dooku's Alliance base. Instead, we had a very pinched timeline in the last movie. Yes they said that ten years had passed, but none of the major story elements seem to have been allowed to happen offscreen. Like I said rushed.

I heard someone complain that some of the lightsaber duels seemed much too choreographed. I think this is probably right.

The seemingly anti-climactic comment from Yoda about Qui-Gon in the last seconds of the movie is sort of jarring as well.

I liked the movie, but I was disappointed. Maybe I'm just disappointed that it is over.

puff

Steroids and Retroactive Record Keeping in Major League Baseball...

Its interesting that home runs are down this year in the MLB. George Dunham on KTCK: The Ticket in Dallas mused a few weeks ago that it might be due to drug testing.

Realistically, in one season the game shouldn't have shifted as drastically as it has...unless there was rampant steroid use and because testing was threatened everybody got off the juice.

Home runs have gone down. ERA's for relief pitchers have come up. And from those two stats, you can guess where the impact/benefits of steroids would show up? That would be home runs and pitching.

I look for this to lead teams to shift emphasis toward better defense with less dependence on power hitting.

It's also interesting that Superman..., oh sorry, Barry Bonds hasn't made it back into the lineup for the San Francisco Giants at all this season. Guess he just can't heal up without his "roids". Sad, really.

As an aside, before the 1995 season, there were only 18 50-homer seasons on the record books in the entire history of Major League Baseball. Since 95, there have been 18 more.

In the last two seasons since BALCO and the steroid flap have started getting increased press, how many 50-homer seasons have there been? Care to guess?

None. Source of these stats is an excellent SI.com article.

Through June of this year, Derrick Lee(Cubs) and Alex Rodriguez(Yankees), both have 17 home runs. That puts them on a pace to do what...about 37 to 45 homers for the season. Quite a drop off from the 73 that Mssr. Bonds hung a couple of years ago, isn't it?

I think that if enough proof can be found of individual steroid use involving McGuire, Bonds, and/or Sosa that Maris's record should be reinstated as the gold standard in home runs. Especially if no one can go break the 61 in the "roid" testing era.

Roger Maris vs. chemically enhanced Supermen...I'm on Maris's side.

NASCAR: The Just Us Cup - Week 13

Week 13 Race Results - Lowe's Motor Speedway - Coca-Cola 600

Finished -- Driver Name/Car No. --Your name here)

3 -- Carl Edwards/99 -(Mark)
8 -- Dale Jarrett/88 -(Darla)
6 -- Greg Biffle/16 --(Jerry)
9 -- Ken Schrader/49 -(Mark)
10 -- Rusty Wallace/2 --(Nancy)
14 -- Kevin Harvick/29 -(John)
21 -- Jaimie McMurray/42 --(Cadi)
26 -- Kasey Kahne/9 -(Cadi)
28 -- Mark Martin/6 --(Jerry)
30 -- Jeff Gordon/24 -(Craig)
33 -- Dale Earnhardt Jr./8 --(Stephanie)
36 -- Michael Waltrip/15 --(Cadi)

Points after Week 13…

NEXTEL Standings - Driver Name/Car No. - Laps Led - NEXTEL Points -(Your name here)

2 - Greg Biffle/16 - 740 - 1676 --(Jerry's Replacement Driver pending Mark Martin's retirement)
5 - Jeff Gordon/24 - 306 - 1516 --(Craig)
7 - Kevin Harvick/29 - 146 - 1485 --(John)
8 - Carl Edwards/99 - 56 - 1459 --(Mark)
9 - Jaimie McMurray/42 - 0 - 1451 --(Cadi)
11 - Rusty Wallace/2 - 219 - 1429 --(Nancy)
12 - Mark Martin/6 - 10 - 1423 --(Jerry)
14 - Dale Jarrett/88 - 1 - 1406 --(Darla)
15 - Dale Earnhardt Jr/8 - 5 - 1397 --(Stephanie)
16 - Kasey Kahne/9 - 314 - 1351 --(Cadi)
18 - Michael Waltrip/15 - 94 - 1295 --(Cadi)
26 - Ken Schrader/49 - 14 - 1123 --(Mark)*

*As of this week all of our drivers would qualify for the playoffs/Chase for the Championship except for Ken Schrader. Right now he is 124 points out of the transfer spot. That is doable.

Asteroid Impacts, 2036

Stephen Ward, a geophysicist with the University of California-Santa Cruz, came up with the projections based on the increased risk from Asteroid 2004 MN4.

The sky watchers expect MN4 to pass through a node in space called a resonance keyhole which could significantly alter its trajectory and bring it onto a heading that will make 2036 a rather good year for surfing...if you live 10 or more miles inland...maybe.

Read the article here.

The estimated impact power of this asteroid would be roughly 1,000 megatons of TNT. Just for comparison, 1 megaton is equal to about 77 Hiroshima bombs.

I watched the two movies the first time and I thought, "Aw that's not so bad for the Pacific. It looks bad for the Gulf. 30 something feet at Port Aransas, Texas.

Then, I saw where it said meters. Port A could be under rough conversion is what...90 feet of water.

Pacific Ocean

Gulf of Mexico

Pardon me...I think I need to throw up...

Golden Palace Casinos...you know, the guys who put their web address on the backs of boxers, as in pugilists not underwear, and seem to buy every weird piece of crap that comes along. They bought that 10 year old grilled cheese sandwich that looked like it had the Virgin Mary on it...well, these guys have definitely upped the "EEEWWWWW" factor.

A few weeks ago, they paid $5,001 for the alleged pregnancy test that Britney Spears used. So Woo Hoo...Good for them, they have something that Britney Spears peed on.

An Ottawa radio station recovered the test from a trash can outside Spears hotel room a few months ago.

Ah yes, to put a price on Britney Spear's pee.

Excuse me...BARF!

Golden Palace spokesman Drew Black said that Golden Palace is looking into going on tour with all of their out of the ordinary items. Included in their collection is the Virgin Mary grilled cheese, a Dortios chip that looks like the Pope's hat, and a haunted cane.

Yeah...Good luck getting people to pay to see that.

Aw, who am I kidding...have you looked around at the gene pool lately. I bet some of these freaks stand in line to see that stuff. And on the night when it rolls through your town, I bet all the trailer parks are empty.

How companies waste their money...

Source: the Associated Press

Recently, three MIT students tried an experiment.

They wrote a computer program that would generate a nonsensical paper.

The result was "Rooter: A Methodology for the Typical Unification of Access Points and Redundancy."

Sounds impressive, right?

It's gibberish and fake.

The introduction to the paper reads:

Many scholars would agree that, had it not been for active networks, the simulation of Lamport clocks might never have occurred.

They, then, began submitting the paper to tech conferences to see if anyone would just accept without have read and tried to understand it.

Remember it's gibberish and it's supposed to be gibberish.

A month or so ago, they received a notice that their paper had been accepted for the Ninth World Multi-Conference on Systemics, Cybernetics, and Informatics which is taking place in July in Orlando.

Just think somewhere out there is a company that is paying for their employees to go to that conference.

DC Heroes -- The Birds and The Bees #4

The adventures of Mal(the Guardian Eagle) and Karen Duncan(the Bumblebee) continue...

The Birds and The Bees #4

By Mark "Puff" Anderson

"The Right Stuff"

"He wiped slime off his shoulders and arms. He glared at the smiling Wally and said in that his deep resonating voice, “Not a word."

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